New year New Hopes

One more year just passed.
Unbelievable!!!!!!
The time flew much faster than a blink of eye. I am unable to recollect whatever I did in this year because it had been an uneventful year for me in every front.

Hope the New Year brings new hopes, new dreams and a new life full of happiness and joy.
Hope the coming year is going to be an eventful one.
Hope I will not be lazy and will get up early and do some workout everyday.
Hope I read new books and watch some beautiful movies in the forth coming year.
Hope I work better in office taking up new challenges giving it my best. Hope I will spend much time with my loved ones.
Hope I will not spend money unnecessarily.
Hope I will eat healthy food always (If not always at least most of the time :) )
Hope I will spend less money over health issues.
Hope I will finish my swimming classes.
Hope I will learn to drive car which is due from past one year.
Hope I will go to see those places which I am planning from past two years :)
Hope I will live in peace which I m searching from past 20+ years :)

Looking at my above ‘hope list’ I think this is why people say new years brings ‘new hopes’ and ‘new dreams’ :)

There is always chance that the same ‘hope list’ will be there next year with some more new added unfulfilled hopes of this year :)

But ... but I am definitely going to try at least some of the items in this new year. Hope god gives me the strength to do so (one more hope to be added in the list) :)

I wish you all a very happy new year. I hope everybody’s dreams and wishes and ‘hope list’ come true in the year to come :)

May god bless you all

Am I ready to die???

“Death” the most inevitable in life. We see, acknowledge and hear about death in our every day’s life.

Big deal !!! the one who is born has to die one day....

Yeah !!! I know that .. but still when I think about death .. I feel scared???
Not only me but most of the people who think about their death they scared.
Why is that so?? Why we get scared???

Let me think.. What are the circumstances that somebody gets scared???
• When something happens accidentally.
• When a student lacks preparation to face the exam
• When an employee is not met the targets

Etc .. etc. ...

There are thousands of situation one gets scared and the single reason behind it is
“Lack of preparation” in other words “we are not ready to face it”

Then what makes us to think and believe we are ready to face the death, the one which is certain, inevitable but not bound to the time.

Here are some pointers,

• If one lives each and every moment of his/her life as if it’s the last moment of my life, enjoying the each and every bit of it then he/she is prepared for it.
• When one realizes death is not the greatest loss in life but the greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live
• When one musters the courage to live
• When one is happy and content
• When one knows about his/her death, I mean when one accepts it that one day its coming to you.(There is lot of difference between knowing about something and accepting the same)

In one simple sentence,
“Start living, then you are prepared to die”. Always be happy. Do the things which makes you happy... pursue your interests, spread the happiness.

Make your life blissful that you meet your death fearless.

After all these churning in my mind I came to know that I am not yet ready to die but I should get ready.

My Newfound Luv !!!!

I think about you ....
Whenever I am awake ......
When I sit in front of my PC....
You make me weak.....
I could not resist you ....
But having a sneak peek .....
I love you Farmville...
You are on face book ....

Yes in deed !!!

I am not able to resist it and have got caught in the whirlwind of Farmville its my newfound love :-)

Try it once.. u will understand better.....

It happened to me !!!

Usually I don’t ask anything from him except for his love and time.

He laughs and says it is easier to give, if you ask for some material possession than time and love. And our love fights follows.....

One day I was coming back from office. I wanted to buy some groceries, so I went to Gandhi bazaar. I was walking on the street and suddenly saw someone who looked like hubby. I stopped and wanted to take a closer look so I went towards him and yes !!!

Its hubby standing in front of jewellery shop !!!!


I was actually thinking of investing in Gold. I didn’t want to buy gold coins instead I thought I will buy jewellery so that it will be an investment as well as I can wear it :-) I discussed the same with hubby, but he was not very much sure, he just said lets think about it. Then we became very busy with other work.

Beaming with happiness I approached towards hubby.

But some girl came to my hubby and she was showing him something.

She looked very happy. Hubby taking that in his hand kissed her on her cheeks.

When I reached him I heard him saying, “it really looks beautiful on you honey !!!”

I felt as if the whole world had come to a stand still....

His words were echoing in my ears. With tremendous shock and fear I tapped him on his back.

He looked at me and was dumbfounded. The girl was holding his hands looked happier with him. Hubby introduced her to me as his girl friend.

I didn’t know what to do... I always had a doubt. I had seen her msgs in his mobile. But I never asked him. I trusted him a lot. My trust is broken and my heart.

With eyes filled with tears I looked at him, my voice was stuck and I was unable to talk. With lot of difficulty I whispered,


“ I knew it !!!”


I asked him,


“This is the girl who used to send msgs to you?”


Thinking for few seconds he replied,


“Oh !! no... That’s another girl”


He made that statement as if having two three girlfriends after your marriage is very normal and natural.


There was no guilt. No hiding. No confusion. No stammer.


His voice was clear and firm.


This was the most unexpected thing to happen in ones life, and I was so unprepared to face it, tell me who will be expecting such things in their lives???


But it happened and it happened to me.

I could not control my emotions...

I cursed finding myself in such situation...

I cursed myself for going to Gandhi bazaar that day....

I was living happily in the world of lies, than in this truth and uncertainty.

I found myself alone in that crowded place...

I cried ... I cried until my energy was drained......

I could not measure how painful it was...

Is this what they call ‘death’???

I was crying aloud .. I was begging god to give me my husband back...

I loved him so much ....

I trusted him... he is my life ... he is my present and he is my future.....

“God please don’t take him away from me I cannot live without him !!!”

I cried .... My eyes are heavy with tears ....

Hubby is consoling me.

I am unable to see him...

I am forcing myself to see him...

I want to see him and I just want a glimpse....

I want to hug him and tell him, how much I love him...

I want to tell him, how much I need him....

He is so confused...

He is holding me in his arms

He is asking me to stop crying...

He is asking me to open my eyes....

With great efforts I finally opened my eyes with tears rolling over my cheeks.

Bed lamp was on, otherwise it was dark.

I tried to recollect what had happened.


I started to laugh.....


Hubby was much more puzzled. He went on questioning what had happened to me.

Poor guy.. I didn’t know whether to tell him or not.

I definitely knew he would feel bad..

How could I even imagine such things...


Finally I told him about my dream.


Now this was his turn to cry ... “God please save me from this female !!!!”

What's the solution ????

Life isn’t smooth always !!!!!!!

I am telling it as if I invented something newly. Every man discovers this truth one or the other time in his life time.

Even though we discover this truth we find it very hard to accept!!!!!!!!!!!!

Any way life has its own way of making us accepting it, that’s another thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why all of a sudden I am talking like a philosopher???????

The answer is quite simple.... I hit this hard truth once again.
Whenever I reinvent this truth I always try to analyze, understand and to find a solution so that I can run my life smoothly but I hardly found success in doing so.

I know what the root cause for this problem is; it’s our “EXPECTATIONS!!!!!!!!!!”

We expect people around us to be good always, expect them to do the things as we like, expect them to talk only those words which are treat to hear.. We expect people to love us
in the way we imagine we want to be loved, cared, respected and blah blah blah !!!!!!!

All in all we expect a perfect family, perfect job, and perfect world ... and we think once everything is perfect even we will become perfect ....

Oh god plz give me a break

While building nourishing our own expectations and dreams do we care about what others are expecting from us??? What we should give in order to get what we are expecting??? Are we perfect before expecting everything to be perfect????

Okey... I have few more cases to be tested before I leave for the day .................

Fine... before I start my work let me tell you the solution otherwise I cannot continue to work.

I won’t say, don’t expect anything at all rather I would say “be one with the world and accept the imperfection” :)

Hmmm.....

Kuch samajh main aya kya !!!!

Maa Kassam, Mujhe bhi samajh mein nahi aya :)

Kaash... I would have understood what I have written !!!!!!!!!!

Why????

I always question myself.... why is it like this????
People whom you love the most and care the most hurt you the most???

But I finally found out that it’s not the others but myself who is hurting me. Because I am the one who has given the permission for them to hurt me.

Then why did I give them the permission??? It’s because I feel they are nearer and dearer to me. I care for them; I value them the most in my life.

Oh my god....

It’s like answering the question...
“Which came first??? The chicken or the egg”

Let me go back to the work instead of getting caught in this dead lock :D

Some Snippets

From past few years I have a habit of getting my photographs clicked every year and laminating it. My parents love those photographs (all the parents believe that their children are the mostest beautiful children in the wholest of the world) and they have hanged all the laminated photographs on the wall. Yesterday few of my friends visited my house and were looking at my pictures. And one commented,

Friend: Very nice pictures.... So next year your parents are going to put two more on the wall is it???

Me: Why two, next year also one photo only know

Friend: the rate at which you are growing horizontally I doubt if next year you can fit into one photograph...............

Me: :-|

*************************************

Yesterday I had been to a function. I met few of my friends there. We had a gala time and then had lunch together. Lunch was really tasty. I had nicely. Then I walked towards the hand wash. One of my friends called me from behind and asked me....

Friend: Hey what are you doing here ???

Me: Washing my hands :-|

Friend: If you are here attending the functions and having the lunch ... who will carry chamudeswari idol in dasara procession ???

Me: :-| :-|


P.S : Elephants carry goddess chamundeswari idol during dasara procession


*************************************

Yesterday hubby was also with me. He met most of my relatives. We reached home. Casually we were talking. In between hubby remarked.

Hubby: none of your relatives or family members is that good looking know

I gave a GOOD look to hubby.

Hubby: err...excluding you dear. You are my wife sweaty. Look at You. You are so good looking. Look at your eyes...they are err ... big.. err... Furious

I continued my GOOD look at him...