Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Adios !!!

Until this moment, I never understood how hard it was to lose something I loved so much. I started blogging on blogsopt which made me realize how powerful words and and how carefully one should choose the words. It gave me a moral strength and to put forward my views about anything I wished.

but now, I am bidding my adios to blogspot....

That doesn't mean I will stop blogging. With all the learning and experiences I got in blogspot I have moved to wordpress and will continue my journey to learn, understand and improve myself .....

In Search Of Myself

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Troll, Et Tu Brutus !!! Poda ha ha ha :-}

Readers, I regret to inform you that this blog is a response to one my friend’s vitriolic rant. if you are not interested, please be advised to stop reading . I never wanted to respond to mindless innuendo's. However, Krishna says one should confront adversity and running away is cowardice. I would have posted a comment in my friend’s blog but fearing the truth, my friend has blocked me from commenting. Where as every one is free to comment here! ;-)

I am not a regular blogger though . One of my friends introduced me to this blogging world where I can write and express myself. I m so glad she did and thankful to her for that. Blogging made me happy and gave me a sense of vivre . Most importantly it made me weigh my thoughts before blurting out ;-)

By the very public nature of blogging, it makes you contemplate over what you are about to blog. More posts of mine have found their way to recycle bin than ending up in blogosphere :-) this is thanks to the sensitivity instilled by this wonderful medium.
By constantly thinking about the effect of words on faceless readers, I have come to appreciate the need to be weigh your words in any type of communication. It is a strange effect considering how much power you are vested with thanks to blogosphere . You remember the tag line of spiderman???

“With greater power comes a greater responsibility”

This friend of mine blogged about an interesting and gripping story about campus crush , making up interesting anecdotes . This is fine as entertainment is fantasy most of the time.

But what was disturbing was referring to real nick names of real people , which can easily be figured out. But why am I disturbed?

What my friend has done is lay bare a chapter of private life restricted to group of friends in public domain. Thrown open the characters of the story up to public scrutiny. Did she take permission from people who are affected by that? No.
secondly without even bothering about by what moral compass public judge the characters, has wantonly discussed about character’s whereabouts.

Lets all understand one thing. Each one of us has a cupboard full of skeletons. What good comes if Pandora’s box were to open today. Let me ask the readers, if your past life is thrown open for scrutiny without your knowledge and permission, how would you feel??
Do you feel happy??
Do you take it sportively???
Or you took it seriously and got hurt????
It depends. Not all are same. Isn’t it???
Not all the fingers in your hand are identical or similar.

As a writer, we need to be socially aware. I don’t buy the humbug of man being a independent entity or creative license. As long as we live in this society, we owe it to society on ethical behavior. I am not talking about morals as morals have too many perspectives. Where as ethics is similar to truth and is unique.

What ethics I am talking about?

Ethically is it right to judge others based on events happened at different time frame and different frame of reference. As the saying goes every saint had a past and every sinner has a future.

Am I a humour killer???
Without talking about people how to make blog humourous. Guys I have come across wonderful blogs which make you laugh and I haven’t seen need to pull people.. Brilliant humour.

Example is domain maximus by sidin vadkut. That guy is amazing. He reminds me of P.G Wodehouse. Let me give an example of his humor. when Obama won Nobel award, he tweeted and his tweet is the most popular among tweeple. Check out

"I just played Solitaire on my computer. And goddammit Obama won that too."

"What is the difference between a Google Wave invite and a Nobel prize? Correct. Anyone can get a Nobel."

Let me stop the monologue and come to crux of the matter.
What made me lose all my moorings and post a comment considered to be harsh, however correct it is.
Why did I lose my nuts?
Let me focus on inappropriate content of the blog under discussion

My friend tells the story about real people using real nick names. That too when the author knew those real characters were best known in the college with their nick names rather the real names. On the top of it, in response to some comment in which it had mentioned that someone had crush on one of her classmates, she replied,
“Am not sure who it is ... Sorry, was it “realname” ???? the girl with flicks?? “real route” route aa ?? if it is her, “marital status” and hs 2 yr old kid now”

Even if she has said things in jest, imagine , if that blog to be read by that person’s relative, and if he turns out be psychotic, what kind of repercussions her life will have .
Babe what were you thinking ???? if you wanna give information which is personal in nature use email or phone or chat .
But using a blog???
definite no no!!!

But the height of hypocrisy is when the person expects that feedback meant for her should be coming through email !!!!!!

Finally who gave my friend the right to discuss about personal stuff in public forum?
Unable to control my anger I wrote the following in her blog, which she has removed. The comment was,

"As internet is accessible by anybody from anywhere in the world, if we give personal information like name, place and etc on the net there are chances that people can misuse the same. At least we should not give such information without the consent of the people. But I see you are doing that in your blog. You write pages about public awareness and as a responsible blogger you should have understood thing but I pity you lacked the common sense.
Learn to respect the privacy of the people and don’t trash people’s emotions in public. Hope you will understand and take the appropriate measures.
Your well wisher”

Was I wrong to post the comment rather than mailing. Yes I should not have let anger control my reasoning and I am sorry. But I don’t regret what I said.
Guess what was reply from my dear friend , I don’t know if the following reply is there in the blog or not as that particular post is now password protected. The following reply to my comment shows how she actually feels for my criticism :-)

“Hold on girl … I am nt sure what u wanna say? Is this revenge u r taking bcoz I hd to cancel meeting u in Blr last time? U cal me a well-wisher and u cud nt understand that I ws hard-pressed for time and cud nt make it. U made an issue out of it and even made me write a sorry post? WTH do u think of urselves? U r nt ready to answer by chat or phone .. u don’t dare do that and u leave such a comment?
I wrote abt a college incident and many ppl cn relate with it? Hd u nt written a false love story abt urself and ur current husband? Which did nt even happen that way?????? U hd even mentioned the company name remember? And for heaven’s sake,I hv nt mentioned anybody’s name here. U and ur friends were the ones responsible for me to lose my friends back then and nw u r bk here again. Use some other form of advertising for ur blog if u need to
And I am what I am; I am not proving to anyone that I hv public awareness or anything as such. So, ppl will read me if they like or push me out. Life does come with miserable pkgs like u too … kya kare
I pity pity pity ur condition
Or is this bcoz u asked me whether u cud write on my blog too and I told u that this is my own space and I want to be the only author. U even told me u came to know there is something like a blog only from me. And now, u r teaching me abt responsibilities and all that? I have never seen another bk-biter like u all my life either in college or @ the workplace. And u call urself my well-wisher? And that other friend of urs, some gr8 DBA who came here to leave a comment, let them all know they r nt welcome to my space and its my wish whom I allow here.
And I hv nthg against V or S. They were my first friends in college and even if they don’t talk to me today or u and ur friends ensured it is so, I can’t be like u and take revenge against ppl. Thank God I hv some values there
In ur place, if I hd a problem with any post, I wud hv written to the person and asked for deleting the post if I ws a real well-wisher!
It’s a light hearted post, which gets conveyed at the very beginning itself.
Everyone goes thru college crushes, friendship, experiences and fun stuff.
Here, no one, even in the comments section, has mis interpreted and/or made “fun” of the person mentioned in the post.
I hope u understood what public awareness exactly means.
Woohoo … one thing I ws missing on my blog ws trolls and nw I have them too I am officially famous now"

I was mesmerized by her creative reasoning :-)
As the readers can see I have been accused of being a friend snatcher. By god’s grace I have been blessed with good friends, never needed to snatch anyone. Friendship is like sand. You hold it too tight it falls off your hand (remember DCH?).
Secondly she has accused me of being a coward not sorting out things with one on one dialogue. But I followed Birbal’s principal and kept quiet. Reader would understand why, if one looks at sample rant left on my chat window by my dear friend.

*******: And bloody girl
u r no one to pity me
I pity u for all that u hv in life
Sent at 11:13 AM on Wednesday
“******: poor u; u dont even dare that

I should have known better. She is a person who once fought with our common friend for leaving a comment on my blog but not in hers. (was she joking ??? might be).
Gimme a break. Comment is not goodie to pass around ;-) . You comment when you feel like ;-) I wonder if she keeps tab on others blog too ;-) sorry for the cheap joke.:-)

I feel pensive at the whole thing. Now I know why the world is the way it is.

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway!!!
Give the world the best you have and you will be badly let down. Give the world the best you have got anyway!!!!
--- (from KARMA Vol. 30 N0. 13)

Adios Senorita !!! God Bless You !!!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Being silent!!!

I am surprised when people think they won the battle when their opposition is silent.
Being silent in some awkward situations like, when you are trying to convey or convince some megalomaniacs or hypocrites who neither wants to be criticized nor wants to understand what others telling,

Yeah!! U better be silent.

Winston Churchill said “When the eagles are silent, the parrots begin to jabber.”

Very true isn’t it????

Monday, February 15, 2010

Love is in the Air !!!

Valentines Day is just over.
It was so colorful everywhere.
I too had a wonderful V Day with hubby.
While soaked up in V day spirit my mind started pulling pranks
Why do we love someone???
What is true love??? etc ... etc ...
After lot of tossing around ideas, I started thinking aloud about these unanswerable questions.

Lets start with: “Why do we love someone???”
We all know that “human by nature is selfish”. But the act of love is selfless. How a man could be selfish and selfless at the same time???

My answer is, man is never selfless. At least 99.99% of human are not.
We love somebody bcoz loving somebody makes us happy. This is same when we help somebody or care for somebody. The act of loving, helping and caring makes us happy. So we are doing it.

Then how can we say that loving somebody is selfless act????

I have a proof to strengthen my view.

We see many instances where a girl refuses to accept a guy's love, then he threats to throw acid on her face or to hurt her in some way. Or guy/girl blackmails saying that they will end their lives if he/she doesn’t accept his/her love. We have seen some people committing suicide on love failure leaving the other person guilty throughout their life. Or some people say,
“I will not marry somebody, I will be loving u for ever.”
“I will not love somebody else. You will be responsible for my depression.”
“You ruined my life by not accepting my love”
"You hurt me by not accepting my love. I will ruin your life" !!!

Do you think these are the symptoms of selfless Love???

Okay !!!

Can somebody stand his/her partner having good time with a person of opposite sex??
Forget about opposite sex. How many times have we quipped/fought with our partners when they went and spend some good time with their friends??
Most of us have done it.

How many of us can accept happily if our partners says they are in love with somebody else and they want to leave us and go with them?

No !!!!

we cannot accept it. As I said earlier at least 99.99% of us will not accept it

Arey Yaar. Love is selfless !!!
We love bcoz we want our loved ones to be happy. Then why can't we leave them or send them happily to be with somebody else they love.

Why ??????

It is so simple. Our love is selfish love. :)

Yeah!!! That’s the bitter truth and hard to accept it.

Love does not happen just in one day. Love at first sight is absolute BS.
It all starts with attraction. Attraction sees only what is good and what we can accept in one person. Only when we start living together and knowing each other, then the love grows. That to a selfish love. Only few blessed ones may develop true selfless love over a period.

What is true or selfless love then??

True love is loving someone without expecting anything from them. Accepting what they are. True love is when you don’t trade your love for their love, which is very tough for most of us.

However, I remember my manager used to say, though you are not a good person act as if you are good. Who knows one day you might really become a good person. So let us continue to be selfish lovers. One day we might become selfless lovers where we only want our loved ones to be happy no matter what.


Thursday, February 4, 2010

Help !

I recently read this quote in one of the mails.

“I came to realize that life lived to help others is the only one that matters and that it is my duty...This is my highest and best use as a human.”

I have helped many people many a times and I have taken help from many. But reading this quote made me think a lot about the topic of “helping” and “Whom to help”.

I have come across many people who have taken help and I have analyzed their behavior after taking help :-)

1. First category of people takes help from others and they do not acknowledge because it hurts their ego.
2. Second: They take help from others, they do not acknowledge and they treat the one who helped them as their enemies.
(Do you wonder!!!
U bet !!! I have seen such people in my life. In fact all of us (with some exceptions) might have come across or will come across such people at least once in life)
3. Third: These are the people who take one inch of help and show their gratitude 10 thousand miles. They exaggerate the greatness of the one who helped them.
(But one should understand that too much of anything is good for nothing :-). But this category of people is better than the above two.)
4. Fourth: They are graceful when they take help. They are graceful in showing their gratitude. I mean to say they do not exaggerate too much.
(But one problem with this kind of species is they are endangered :-) )

So what I am trying to tell is, as Krishna himself said in Bhagavad-Gita “whenever you are giving something or helping somebody make sure that he must be a worthy recipient. The recipient is graceful enough.”

Help as long as you want as much as you want throughout your life but make sure you have the answer for the question "Does he deserve???", before you jump to help.

As recipient one should make an attempt to question their own worthiness to receive the help. Because the one who is helping is already great whether he is graceful in helping or forced or helping as duty or sacrificing or for any damn reason, he has decided to help you.
When we make ourselves deserving it helps all those who wants to help us throughout their lives :-)

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Honi ko kaun taal sakta hai????

Let me tell you a story.

An astrologer tells the king that the prince (new born baby) will be killed by a lion at the age of 9. King who was very scared and wanted to save his child from getting killed by the lion kept the baby inside the palace always and never allowed him to go out. Years passed away and then came the kids 9th birthday. King was very happy to see his son still alive and now nothing can happen to the prince. King being the king wanted to celebrate his son’s birthday in a very grand fashion. The whole palace is decorated and thousands of people were invited. The celebrations were going fine. And suddenly a statue which was put above the door for decorating purpose fell on the prince and the kid dies. The statue which killed the kid was the statue of lion :-). So finally the kid was killed by lion.

Now let me ask you something..........

Do you love mountains???
Do you love snow???
Do you love flying in the sky like bird or at least to fly in the plane or do paragliding??
Do you love swimming like a fish???

But still you are not climbing the mountain coz u might fall down??? Not swimming bcoz u r scared u might get drown?? Not flying bcoz u might have a free fall and might get multiple bone fractures???

Very sad......

One might die while sleeping... being afraid of vehicles if one stops riding them might get hit by any vehicle while he is walking on the footpath ( I see more number of vehicles running over the footpath than on the road these days :-)). Anything can happen anytime.

If at all something has to happen it will definitely happen what so ever (please refer the above story). Don’t stop yourself doing what you love thinking u are being cautious.

Enjoy today and stop thinking about tomorrow :-)

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

New year New Hopes

One more year just passed.
The time flew much faster than a blink of eye. I am unable to recollect whatever I did in this year because it had been an uneventful year for me in every front.

Hope the New Year brings new hopes, new dreams and a new life full of happiness and joy.
Hope the coming year is going to be an eventful one.
Hope I will not be lazy and will get up early and do some workout everyday.
Hope I read new books and watch some beautiful movies in the forth coming year.
Hope I work better in office taking up new challenges giving it my best. Hope I will spend much time with my loved ones.
Hope I will not spend money unnecessarily.
Hope I will eat healthy food always (If not always at least most of the time :) )
Hope I will spend less money over health issues.
Hope I will finish my swimming classes.
Hope I will learn to drive car which is due from past one year.
Hope I will go to see those places which I am planning from past two years :)
Hope I will live in peace which I m searching from past 20+ years :)

Looking at my above ‘hope list’ I think this is why people say new years brings ‘new hopes’ and ‘new dreams’ :)

There is always chance that the same ‘hope list’ will be there next year with some more new added unfulfilled hopes of this year :)

But ... but I am definitely going to try at least some of the items in this new year. Hope god gives me the strength to do so (one more hope to be added in the list) :)

I wish you all a very happy new year. I hope everybody’s dreams and wishes and ‘hope list’ come true in the year to come :)

May god bless you all